Feeling "Touched Out" And What's Helped Me As A Full-Time Working Mother

I’ve expressed on my blog every now and again that I am indeed a working mother. Prior to this year, my husband and I worked opposite schedules so that we wouldn’t need to put the kids in daycare. This Spring, my husband got a new job with a schedule that had the same hours as my job. Thankfully (and seriously, I am so thankful) I work for the family business, and I am able to bring my kids to work with me. No joke, I got a quote for daycare for $1,400 for 4 hours of care for three days a week - What??? That’s about as much as my mortgage payment!

Needless to say, my days are long. Again, I am so grateful that I can bring my kids with me to work, but I am pushed to my limit on the daily.

The phrase “touched out” has been circling around social media and the meaning according to parents.com states:

Being touched out is when a parent is tapped by their children, significant other, and even that dang dog for physical comfort throughout the day and becomes irritable as a result of missing out on their autonomy. Some may compare it to parenting burnout, but feeling touched out can go beyond parenting to affect the relationship between partners.
Some moms go as far as saying they don't want to hug, kiss, or be intimate in any way with their partner after a full day of being clung to by their kids. They physically cringe at the idea of being touched even one more time during the day.

So between the kids, work, and caring for the kids at work, I get overstimulated and unable to enjoy my post-work evening with my little family. I don’t want anything to do with anyone, especially when it comes to touch - I have more days where I am frustrated and “touched out” than I have days where I feel more calm. The slightest touch or sound or even smell can be the final zing to my last nerve, and its hard to not lose my shit every time it happens.

So, what do I do to help?

I’m finding that if I can squeeze in 30 minutes of time for myself after we all get home, I’m able to get a little boost of energy and calmness before jumping back into parenting the rest of the evening. What this looks like really depends on the day. If the kids have had a rough day (fussiness, no naps, etc.) I’ll hop in a hot shower. Most days I am able to escape to our unfinished basement and work on my resin dice (I’ll be sharing more about this soon!) It is quite calming and therapeutic for me to sit and either mix the resin to make the dice, demolding the dice - I love the whole process of making dice, and finding time to do something I love helps me feel less touched out and more so like an individual again.

I’ve also changed my sleep schedule so I can have at least an hour to myself in the morning before the entire house wakes up. It’s so nice and quiet that I can actually focus enough to sit down and write! Sometimes I can squeeze in a shower before the kids wake up, but if I don’t it’s OKAY because I already feel awake and refreshed to go into the day of parenting with a calmer mindset.

Parenting is no walk in the park, and I understand how hard it is to find that time for yourself whether you are a working mom, a stay-at-home mom, or crazy enough as I am to bring your kids to work with you! I’ve gathered a few resources for my readers in case you are experiencing feeling touched out like I am. I hope reading this made you feel less alone, and you’re doing great mama.